It’s very likely that at some point in your life, what you had planned for yourself did not happen. As I grow older, I’ve come to realize it’s a huge part of being an adult and growing up. Life throws curve ball after curve ball and we have to learn to accept them and keep on going. Today I’m sharing a bit of a personal post in the hopes of encouraging other women in the same boat.
When Things Don’t Go Your Way
For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to be a mother. I have a background working in childcare as a teacher with infants up to pre-school. I really loved my time doing that and for me it confirmed my desire to one day care for my own child. Fast forward many years of dating, a marriage, fun newlywed life, and a few years in between and it was my turn to be a mom! Now at 26 weeks pregnant, I am really getting excited to meet my daughter this June! There’s been curve balls throughout pregnancy but there has been one curve ball that has really been tough to swallow.
You see for as long as I’ve dreamed about being a mother in general I’ve also dreamed about being a stay at home mom. My mom stayed home with me and my sisters as did my husband’s mother. I knew that was what I wanted and what my husband wanted and never thought much of it being a huge obstacle. Sadly, in the times we live in being a full time stay at home mom is extremely rare and often impossible for many families. What I thought was just a personal choice is often not the case in today’s society.
For the time being, it looks like I will be taking a maternity leave and then returning back to work. This really isn’t a simple lifestyle choice that we’ve made, it’s a necessity. This may seem normal and okay for many women and that is wonderful. Working moms are so amazing and I respect them so much more today than ever. However, this wasn’t something I wanted for myself. The thought of going back to work right now feels devastating and unbelievably sad. I know I’ll be doing a lot of praying for extra strength and courage during a time of transition.
I’m not writing this to make you feel bad for me. I’m writing this for a few reasons. One, I hope to show others that people’s situations are not always an easy black and white decision. Maybe you want to judge a mother for putting their child in daycare from 7am to 6pm but maybe that very mother doesn’t have a choice. Let’s build up mothers whether they are full time workers, part time workers, or in the home full time. Let’s remember that everyone has to make choices and sacrifices that aren’t always easy or a part of their original plans. After all, life is unexpected and life can be really challenging. However, life is also a beautiful gift that we are given each day.
Right now, I’m still working on what my life after my leave will look like. I don’t know all of the details of my work schedule and I won’t know for a while. Who knows, my situation could even change in that time and maybe I will at some point be able to stay home full time. Crazier things have happened! But, maybe I won’t. That is life sometimes and I still choose to continue on and find the beauty of the situation.
So, I’d ask for your encouragement and support while I navigate these curve balls and thank you for all of the love I’ve already felt throughout this journey. If you are like me and wondering what is possible for your family, know that you aren’t alone.
Lastly, I’d like to remind you (and myself) that life has a weird way of working itself out. It might not work itself out exactly when you want it to or even how you thought you wanted it to, but so often things are better than you planned for yourself. I know my baby is loved and supported and will be well taken care of no matter what and that is truly the most important thing of all.
How do you handle life’s curve balls? What can you do today to support someone struggling through a tough time?
Tell me in the comments below!